The Breakup

Snap out of it as soon as possible. Not worth bursting your hearts and brains about it.

The car is in full speed when the blue truck in front suddenly breaks, the trailer behind it turning clockwise, threatening to strike the car out. She breaks hard, and decides to take the car off the highway, into the fields, turning hard to the left. She feels a solid jerk as the car hits the ditch. She misses the sweeping truck by inches; it hits the van that was traveling just ahead of her, the metal making a sad and friction noise, accompanied by the ugly screeching of breaks. Then there is silence. And smoke. She is in a corn field, her rear view mirror showing the metal carnage behind.

She is still, her heart pounding like a hydraulic drill. But she is stable, not trembling. She gets out of the car. The sun is low to the left of her, where the road meets the horizon. From the look of it, it seems no lives might be lost here. A lot of damage to the vehicles.

She is thinking about the fight...or ‘discussion as he preferred calling it. A break up is a break up... no denying its aftershocks. She felt as if it all had been a big deception. NOW it made all sense – just too good to have been true anytime during its two years existence. She never thought he was capable of such a deceit. A lot of other men would have loved her more...and true

“Aap OK hai, ma’m?”

A constable is asking her, from a patrolling jeep that happened to be passing by. His partner is helping the guy from the van.

“I’m fine”

He comes closer and examines her, then the car. The Mini seems in a good condition.

Just the god damned icing on the cake. What a way to get him out of my mind. What a nice accident! No loss of life, just an interruption in the everyday mundane life.

The traffic is mounting on the road, the hint of an inevitable traffic jam. One more police jeep arrives; she hears a cry of sirens getting closer – an ambulance perhaps.

The evening is nice. A cool breeze accompanies the golden sunlight. She feels thrilled. At the expense of some broken bones of complete strangers! The thought brings a smile to her face. Her long, auburn hair is looking like golden fiber optic. She hadn’t felt so relieved in days. And now, thinking about the past few minutes, she realizes that she could have been all but trapped inside the mangled remains of her car, her body twisted in weird shape, medics trying fruitlessly to get her back to breathing. Alright, what’s the big deal? It wasn’t an NDE. Being crippled, now that’s the worst thing. You’re still standing on two.

The truck is spilling beans, from a small slit door that has gotten opened. The beans are a kind she hasn’t seen before. She hears someone calling them oil seeds. The reason for the accident is a broken down Corolla. It has got a big dent on the behind, where the truck had thumped it. A woman is standing a few feet away from the car, with a baby in her arms. Her husband is on the phone, asking for a replacement vehicle.

“Abe car ki wat lag gayi hai, mai jinda hu yahi badi baat hai. Car bhej de...koi bhi bhej yaar, ye saala meeting crucial hai”

“Send me yours then! Just send me a car, any car. I’m at...”

There is space enough only for a single car to pass by, where the truck has come to rest on the road. Its trailer is bent and overturned on its side, blocking the entire left side of the road.

She is still on the Expressway, two hours after the accident, when the crane arrives. An hour later, the road is back to its ‘express’ state.

As she gets in the driver seat, she gets this jolt of relief, a moment of pure joy, almost orgasmic in its nature! She is smiling.

She feels free, away from all that was binding, all that maligned her heart, she feels like a phoenix, rising up and away from the ashes of afflicting memories...she is no more capsizing...it’s a new day for her, the night is no more dark.

As she enters the sleeping city, she knows the day would be one of the loveliest ever.

Witpick of the day!

If the grass is greener on the other side, then the guy with the greener grass doesn't think your grass is greener now does he?

witpick of the day!

Pretty girls like to recruit their rejections and call them friends

A line matters!

Movie taglines are the one line telling of the entire story. They can be quite effective in catching the attention..or not! These are ten of the more memorable ones, in no particular order.

"The truth can be adjusted" - Michael Clayton

"Whoever saves one life, saves the world entire" - Schindler's List

"Movie-wise, there has never been anything like it - laugh-wise, love-wise, or otherwise-wise!" - The Apartment

"A homespun murder story." - Fargo

"On every street in every city, there's a nobody who dreams of being a somebody." - Taxi Driver

"Stealin' Stones and Breakin' Bones" - Snatch.

"Movies were his passion. Women were his inspiration. Angora sweaters were his weakness." - Ed Wood

"In October of 1994 three student filmmakers disappeared in the woods near Burkittsville, Maryland, while shooting a documentary...A year later their footage was found." - The Blair Witch Project

" The Strangest Vengeance Ever Planned!" - Touch of Evil

"The mission is a man." - Saving Private Ryan

Foo fighters, toothpicks etc

There is a lot of time on my hands these days. Especially when I'm up around 6 a.m.! I go jogging, no kidding!

TV is boring, the IPL is very monotonous, and though I do read books, somehow that has gone down a bit.

So, I turned to the internet. Wikipedia to be precise. I started reading there, on a variety of topics.

The state of Maine in the US is the largest exporter of blueberries and toothpicks! Isn't that interesting! I have never tasted a blueberry, but I'm sure I would like it! It's blue after all, my favorite colour. And toothpicks, ah! I had a good four years training on them! I had braces.

And the UFOs! The probable reasons given for UFOs are - clouds, lightening, commercial planes, squid boats' lights reflected on the clouds(!), Venus, Mercury, baloons, light houses etc.

There is a page on wiki which lists the UFO sightings so far around the globe.

Some of them are really dumb - especially abductions - Who would believe that a Brazilian (or was it French?) farm worker was abducted by these little aliens, and on the ship, he had sex with this fab alien blond! Sounds promising; but what if she came back and claimed child support? Do they accept Mastercard in Andromeda galaxy?

One Chinese guy even claims that after he got lucky ( in his case, the alien blond came to his bedroom!) and when they took him to the ship, he was told that in sixty years on some planet, a Chinese peasants child would be born! I mean come on! Mao in the milky way!? No way!

A few accounts seem quite genuine - those reported by air force pilots of different countries. In some cases they include the UFO's radar signature, which strengthens the assumption that there must have been something up there! Most notable is the Tehran incident of 1976 and the Caron Sink incident, 1952

These stories are an interesting read. And there are plenty of them so I'm not complaining!

P.S. - What's a foo fighter? Any guesses?

What sets you free?

Is it the challenge to live a better life, a moment of forgiveness, the laughter from an unseen corner, the lights chasing away the shadows, or is it something you don’t know yet?

Is it the music you cannot resist, the visions you see, the dreams you vivify, the words that inspire...

Is it the truth that beacons, the moments that thrill, the love that transcends or the knowledge that enlightens?

What sets you free?

a modern midnight conversation

+ The things aren’t’ very normal anywhere. In your home, in the school, out in the market, in the government. Your eyes search for normalcy and settle their vision there where they find some.

= You are a big skeptic, aren’t you?

+ Look around you, man.

= I do look around. I find a perfect little normal world.

+ You have to look beneath the surface, examine the cracks a little better. How are things at home?

= How does that make sense in this discussion?

+ How are you folks, I mean with each other?

= What are you talking about?

+ Let me, ah, REPHRASE the question – How’s their married life?

= (a stare) it is quite seamless.

+ That’s the surface, my friend. When you go home after the exam, just observe. Little things, the way they sort out little differences, the unnecessary tiffs that happen over the slightest issues, the...

= You don’t know them, stop getting bloody judgmental.

They sit silently and sip from their Kingfisher cans. The night is warm and sweaty, without any wind, the moonlight making it seem extra warm. Typical summer. The balcony overlooks a slum dwelling, tin roofs and walls, but increasingly concrete houses, most of them under construction.

The two are in their early 20s, engineering grads. They are preparing for their semester exams, but at that moment, they are just killing the exam boredom that’s characteristically engineering-type.

He lights his B&H Lights and sits back

= Those things are part of any marriage. That is very normal. Nothing is ever 100%, is it?
+ Take my example. When I started going around with $, the first few weeks, were just a bliss, man. It was flawless Even the first year, we were cool. Now, after almost 2 years, it is not that, right? For me, that was normal, so what we have now is far from it. We fight, we take each other for granted, we try to have our way in things, and I see it happening. And it’s well past the normalcy phase.

= Look, you have to work on things. You can’t just say things got out of hands.

+ It’s better if things happen on their own.

= If you don’t contain a river, it’s bound to overflow its bank. If it matters a lot to you, you should be ready to go to any length to make it work

He suddenly grabs him by his arms – in a fake Irish accent – ‘What are you prepared to do?”

+ You have gone crazy!

= that was from...

+ I know, the Untouchables

= It seemed appropriate at this juncture

They both burst into laughter

= When I was returning from home, this really weird thing happened in my bogy. The TTE came, and started checking tickets, ok.

TTE, to this Bihari “Ticket dikhao”

The guy “khidki pe hai”

Everyone there, including the TE, was like, taken aback! Seriously, that guy was not kidding.

TTE - “kaunsi khidki pe?”

Bihari - “ticket wali”

TTE, trying his best to make sense of the whole thing – “to tum idhar kya kar raha hai?’

Bihari – “Wo khidkiwala bola wait karo, tum waiting list me hai. To humne socha chalo train he me na wait kar le, kyun? Sahi kiye na hum?”

Both of them start laughing uncontrollably.

+ Kya badawala chuitya hoga wo..

= Abe bihari babu to mast tha. No tension. TTE to do minute tak ekdum chup!

+ fir settle kaise kiya?

= wo bihari babu aapne 2-4 dost leke aaya kahi se. to fir TTE ki thodi fat li (laughter)... usko kone me leke gaya, kuch to setting kiya, TTE ko khilaya kuch 100-200. Mai us time nahi hasa tha, par baad me yaad aake ganda hasa tha. Saala bolta hai ticket khidki pe hai (laughter)

= tera kitna hua hai?

+ Pahele do ho gaye

= sahi hai be. Doosra kafi bada hai. Full architecture. I hate this CO shit

+ It’s not that tough.

= Dude, it’s a pain in my royal ass. I can’t remember all the schematics and block diagrams man.

+ Do it with thanda dimaag. It’ll fit right in. Chalo, bahut bukchodi kar li be. Wo harami laga hua hai nau baje se, saala kal tak poora chat ke phirse baithega.

= Ek sutta share karenge?

+ Thik hai

# What are you guys drinking?

The voice belongs to a short, tense looking fella. Red eyes and bushy hair. He is doing engineering for the knowledge’s sake

= Ho gayi teri padhai harami?

+ Kingfisher...mineral water

# Really? Does it taste better than Bisleri?

+ Yes it does...it tastes much better

# You are drinking beer!

+ Haan, ghante. You think we would waste time and money on some dumbass mineral water?

Quotes

I've been collecting a few quotes for sometime now. They are from the movies I liked, from the people I admire - actors and musicians and such, from the articles I've read - It's a personal collection. So here it is!

"Running introduces you to your worst enemy, to that person who tells you, "Ooh, our ankles hurt and we should stop. Why do we need to run eight kilometers? Let us run five". That is the same person who says to the man," Hey, your wife will never find out if you sleep with her," and the same person who tells a 16-year old, "you are not gonna be cool if you do not smoke it". If you start giving in to that person, you will never get to your goals"

- Will Smith

"Music should reach out to people, you can't afford to be so introverted. I think that anything that reaches out and touches people emotionally is doing a service whether people understand why it's moving them or not. We always wanted our music to have heart, you know. That's why we sometimes sound a little weird and cranky 'cause we always try to leave the heart in. And also, we always wanted our records to be like doors to other worlds. We wanted to say, 'Look, here's the door, why not open it and walk through to the otherside and maybe take a look around and see if you like it?'"

- Peter Buck (R.E.M.)

I tell people,"Start your career tomorrow. If you had a bad year, learn from it and do better. If you had a good year, I've already forgotten about it"

- Jeffery R. Immelt
CEO & Chairman, GE

"If you're smart, you'll always be humble. You can learn all you want, but there'll always be somebody who's never read a book who'll know twice what you know."

- David Duchovny


Gavin Banek: "It's like you go to the beach. You go down to the water. It's a little cold. You're not sure you want to go in. There's a pretty girl standing next to you. She doesn't want to go in either. She sees you, and you know that if you just asked her her name, you would leave with her. Forget your life, whoever you came with, and leave the beach with her. And after that day, you remember. Not every day, every week... she comes back to you. It's the memory of another life you could have had. Today is that girl."

- from "Changing Lanes"

This one's not exactly a quote, just a piece of dialog. If you have seen the movie, you'll know!

Will: Do you like apples?
Clark: Yeah.
Will: Well, I got her number. How do you like them apples?

- from "Good Will Hunting"

a song for the summer (respite)

I want to go
someplace colder
where the trees shiver
and sunlight seldom wanders

the night is icy blue
the day shiny cool
the coffee ever lasting
a fireplace for the fool

the smoke rings remind
the days foregone
the foggy window
forever alone

the air so clear
the leaves are frosty
the moon at the horizon
so cool and mighty!

Nocturnal

All the crazy things to write , that’s what gets decided when they come inside the brain , but when you start writing , oh boy, they are no more. What if you saw people on the street outside your house at three fifty in the morning, with torches. Imagine that – you are trying to sleep but can’t. Some random, stupid, may be uncompleted wishes (read ‘Should have asked her out….or’ Should I still?’ ‘What’s with the age thing anyway, doesn’t make much sense. Much? No sense’) and crazy thoughts, like how would a bullet from an ak 47 would feel hitting you and twisting its way inside the flesh would feel. This might sound like a dream of a sadist, but given the position acquired by this weapon in pop-psyche, its no wonder. Or if you really want a milder version, how about shooting someone else, or being a Special Forces member or something, and may be an MP5 or an M16 instead. Anyway, going a bit too wide of the middle stick here. So you are trying to sleep. The bed is perpendicular to the road, with your head to the wall and legs towards the street.

Scene 1
A quiet street, late at night…It’s a street in a residential area; houses on both sides…most of the houses are right on the steet without any porches or verandas. There are three guys in a house. Say post grad students.

(In the house)

Lights are out. All are asleep except one. He is twisting and turning, trying to stay still. Rest is not assured for him tonight. He hears some murmur outside. May be a dog sniffing at a bush. But those are footsteps, like feathers dropping on tin. The window is right behind him, He moves his head up, he can see the trees at the other side of the road, the leaves enjoying a late night breeze.Suddenly,the first flame appears, immediately followed by the other and then the next. The same view is on the other side. They are parallel running.
He is dumb founded. Not sure if scared, may be thrilled.
The torch bearers are clad in uniforms, ritual like. Kind of KKK, but not white, and certainly not with a pointed hood and a child in one arm. The faces are visible, but they have no vision. The vision is fixed somewhere ahead. They are drawn towards a larger flame it seems. Now there is a third row, walking in between the two lines….

They finally finish. He is still, playing it again and again. I could have taken that on video, given I had a camera. The beauty of it he can not deny. Will this occur again? May be. Goes back to the bed. His own response seems too cold for him. This is like none other, this is X Files stuff; well this ain’t Roswell either. He laughs at that one. Is an explanation necessary? Who cares who they were. Some cult which believes in not disturbing people by not making any noise. Oh but if some pudding hearted fool sees this at 4 o clock in the morning, he is going to think the British have come again to claim one of their biggest colonies back, and a Satyagraha is already underway.Hmmm.He might as well wake the entire street up and call up the fire brigade. Who knows.

A star is not alone

A star is not alone. At least 3/4^th of them aren’t. They have companions. Take Castor for example, in the constellation of Taurus. It is made of SIX stars! Three pairs of revolving binaries, and they are separable only by a spectroscope - by differentiating between their individual spectra. It will be amazing to travel to such a star system. Just imagine watching six stars revolving around each other – well it is not that simple, but the view would be breathtaking!

Paired stars are not uncommon, it’s the loners like our Sun that are. One of the early theories about the extinction of dinosaurs assumed that the Sun had a companion. It was the proximity of that other star, during one of its revolutions that produced imbalance in the Earth’s ecosystem, resulting in the destruction of the giant reptiles. If so, that buddy star should have been found by now, and its orbit determined.

Another exciting phenomenon occurs when one of the stars dies and becomes a black hole – you have a scene where one star is revolving around nothing, since the black hole will only be visible in x-ray or infrared wavelengths!