goddamnit im bored!!! this job is boring, sitting around in an uncomfertable chair and typing lame ass non discript thngs on the screen....this is not a man's job!! i would rather be a firefighter or a lumberjack...i'd rather be anywhere, doing anything but this....
What could i do...what does one do......you've got one life....need to do things that make some sense...in the prime years,instead making your bones weak in inactivity. I hate this!
Monday, June 29, 2009
Tuesday, June 9, 2009
Office space
My office has shifted to a new location. We have moved to Narangibaag lane, a laid back residential lane, tree lined on both sides. It is a soothing sight compared to the harshness of Nagar road.
The one rain that we have had so far, was a beautiful spectacle, with winds making the trees dance wildly. The many birds which reside in these tress make this quite an interesting place. Doves are in a plenty, and also Bulbuls, Parakeets and some others which I haven't been able to ID!
The office building is right in the middle of one of the most expensive residential blocks in the city.
A building coming up diagonally across the office will have one suite each floor, with its own swimming pool and jacuzi! You can only guess the price tag it would carry...
It took some time to adjust here, but since then its been good. Plenty of eating-out options nearby, which is a big plus point: there's KP and DP road, teo main streets with a few kms.
Thats it about the new office...
The one rain that we have had so far, was a beautiful spectacle, with winds making the trees dance wildly. The many birds which reside in these tress make this quite an interesting place. Doves are in a plenty, and also Bulbuls, Parakeets and some others which I haven't been able to ID!
The office building is right in the middle of one of the most expensive residential blocks in the city.
A building coming up diagonally across the office will have one suite each floor, with its own swimming pool and jacuzi! You can only guess the price tag it would carry...
It took some time to adjust here, but since then its been good. Plenty of eating-out options nearby, which is a big plus point: there's KP and DP road, teo main streets with a few kms.
Thats it about the new office...
Wednesday, April 22, 2009
In Bruges
Can a hitman have a heart? If so, can it feel pity or remorse?what about guilt? Hitmen are people in the end anyway.
Can the above questions be core of a very well made , character driven, funny, beautiful looking piece of cinema? Well, yes.
It's called In Bruges. Like the title, it is almost entirely filmed in Bruges, Belgium.
Ray (Colin Farrell) is a fresh recruit and botches up his first job. He is sent away to Bruges with his older partner Ken(Brendan Gleeson) by their employer, Harry (Ralph Fiennes) to await further instructions.
There, the two invariably are affected by the city, the younger chap doesn't like the inaction of the place, and his guilt at killing a little kid in his first job starts overwhelming him. The older guy actually like the city a lot, with its medieval architecture and winding canals and cobbled pathways
The two interact with a host of characters which includes a midget (dwarf :)) actor from America, a beautiful drug supplier for whom Ray falls hard and an eccentric arms supplier who like alcoves; the story takes the turn when Harry orders Ken to kill Ray.
Collin Farrell is the champion here. His portrayal of the guilt ridden hitman is a superb mixture of vulnerability, recklessness, violence, absurdity and the edgy Irish humour. But his guilt is real, and he is honestly suicidal throughout the movie!
The two are trapped in Bruges, and forced to look inwards and contemplate their lives so far, and where they might be headed. Bruges is their Purgatory . It is here that they are stuck, between Heaven and Hell, waiting for their individual judgement days,
This is definitely a "different" movie. I was expecting a Hollywood style all guns blazing show, but it turned out to be something much, much better. A screenplay like this getting a chance into being made into a movie with two A list actors is a huge thing. I mean there is no Jason Bourne here!
And it was released in India! And I missed it there :( So had to watch it on HBO with heavy cutting of even mildly violent scenes, which was quite irritating. Not to add the muting of every Fook -a British movie without any F words! How sad...
A very gratifying watch after all.
The Dream
He was sitting in a room, which resembled a flight deck of a space ship – lot of buttons on the front panels, but what he remembered clearly was the huge window, tall and wide, showcasing the immense stretch of the stars that shone brightly outside, but he couldn’t tell whether the view was from a space ship or from earth.
He was there with his father, standing behind him. They were looking at the scene in front of them, and suddenly, the stars shifted, the whole sky shuddering violently, as if someone had shaken the camera of a live telecast, only it was right in front of his eyes. It was as if a massive earthquake had hit the skies, and made the stars shift their immortal positions. It filled him with an overwhelming sense of finality, like watching the last ball of an unchaseble target, the end to everything…and peace
He was there with his father, standing behind him. They were looking at the scene in front of them, and suddenly, the stars shifted, the whole sky shuddering violently, as if someone had shaken the camera of a live telecast, only it was right in front of his eyes. It was as if a massive earthquake had hit the skies, and made the stars shift their immortal positions. It filled him with an overwhelming sense of finality, like watching the last ball of an unchaseble target, the end to everything…and peace
Thursday, February 5, 2009
Fear
Fear is the real denominator. It is the active force that pushes you…or freezes you. It is the liquid energy that can become hope, determination or shear power with time.
Fear is causal, always attached to something; it needs an anchor. It is felt in the chest, in the stomach, on the skin, on the tongue…everywhere. Fear belittles the ambitions, the free spirit. It cripples the presence of mind
It also forces unprecedented actions… under the pressure of fear, the rigid bonds in the mind are broken, for better or for worse…if for better, than one can soar as high as imaginable, and the fear of fear is shed exponentially with the height…but if for worse, then one becomes a black hole, sucking all the light and living in permanent cold darkness…the lights of hope are never there to break the tentacles of despair and melancholy.
Fear is the bitter pill that’s hard to swallow; it is both the pain and the cure. Fear is not the gun, but it is the hand that pulls the trigger, it is not the criminal, but the criminal intent – it is the ultimate pusher, catalyst, inflictor. It blinds the faith and wounds the soul.
Someone great said, “The only thing to fear is fearlessness”; we fear everything else but that.
Fear is causal, always attached to something; it needs an anchor. It is felt in the chest, in the stomach, on the skin, on the tongue…everywhere. Fear belittles the ambitions, the free spirit. It cripples the presence of mind
It also forces unprecedented actions… under the pressure of fear, the rigid bonds in the mind are broken, for better or for worse…if for better, than one can soar as high as imaginable, and the fear of fear is shed exponentially with the height…but if for worse, then one becomes a black hole, sucking all the light and living in permanent cold darkness…the lights of hope are never there to break the tentacles of despair and melancholy.
Fear is the bitter pill that’s hard to swallow; it is both the pain and the cure. Fear is not the gun, but it is the hand that pulls the trigger, it is not the criminal, but the criminal intent – it is the ultimate pusher, catalyst, inflictor. It blinds the faith and wounds the soul.
Someone great said, “The only thing to fear is fearlessness”; we fear everything else but that.
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
the next life?
Where would you like to take birth in the next life?
I would like to be born in some other country, probably in Europe
Don’t you love India? Have you no respect and liking for your motherland?
Look, I like this country, to a certain extent…its complicated. I definitely don’t see things around me that make me proud of India. What should I be proud of, the unity in diversity crap? There are more divisions in this country than cracks on a shattered window pane. The India shining propaganda is as old as the non existent shine.
So, if I’m worthy of another human life, if at all it is there, I see no harm in saying I would like to belong to a better society. This answer has everything to do with the way I have perceived the society around me, all that this mind has witnessed over all these years – it is not a liberal progressive right wing India bashing- it sounds like it, but it isn’t. We are doing well in many ways, but there are fundamental flaws that undermine ALL the progress. It is hard to overlook the blaring negatives and say that we are the superpower of the future. Mass of the populous of this country lives just to see the next day. Talk about India Shining to them and you are bound to get a blank face. They’ll just say they want better roads, electricity…atleast an honest government. We don’t care about the GDP. Give us a better way of life. That is where this country has failed all along and it is failing as we live out our days
I would like to be born in some other country, probably in Europe
Don’t you love India? Have you no respect and liking for your motherland?
Look, I like this country, to a certain extent…its complicated. I definitely don’t see things around me that make me proud of India. What should I be proud of, the unity in diversity crap? There are more divisions in this country than cracks on a shattered window pane. The India shining propaganda is as old as the non existent shine.
So, if I’m worthy of another human life, if at all it is there, I see no harm in saying I would like to belong to a better society. This answer has everything to do with the way I have perceived the society around me, all that this mind has witnessed over all these years – it is not a liberal progressive right wing India bashing- it sounds like it, but it isn’t. We are doing well in many ways, but there are fundamental flaws that undermine ALL the progress. It is hard to overlook the blaring negatives and say that we are the superpower of the future. Mass of the populous of this country lives just to see the next day. Talk about India Shining to them and you are bound to get a blank face. They’ll just say they want better roads, electricity…atleast an honest government. We don’t care about the GDP. Give us a better way of life. That is where this country has failed all along and it is failing as we live out our days
Friday, December 26, 2008
Can’t get there from here
Indian roads are more fatal than bomb blasts and AK47s. They are disorderly and chaotic. The red signal is just a fucking joke – that’s what most of us feel…
Whoever tells you that India is ‘shinning’, that it’ll be a superpower by 2030 or whatever year is a fucking liar.
How can it be a superpower? On what basis? The bloody GDP and FDI? I don’t care about them, no sir! Give me a good road to walk on and some public transportation first. Fuck the Indian cricket. I don’t care if we loose every single match henceforth or Sachin gets out on 99 till he retires, I simply don’t give a fuck! Those are the least important things in our country’s context.
We need real growth. We need mobilization of funds and people, of minds and acts, to put the people first. The one billion people are expecting some basics in their lives from the government. And those expectations have been there for ages now. Don’t sell us the story of a shinning India for there exists none. The multi-millions of poor have always been in the rear view, much closer than they appear. But we have been ignoring all of them…I say we since it is not some alien superpower or our very ‘friendly’ neighbors that have caused the exploitation of our masses. It’s been us all along the way. We have shunted our own growth. We, who don’t pay taxes, we who break the signal everyday, we who bribe as per our convenience and then close our eyes and shout in protest, we who realize only after a dozen and more cops die from the 7.62 mm Kalashnikov bullets that ‘OH! They did not have good enough bullet proof vests’. You fucking morons, it took you a bunch of brave hearts cops’ death to realize that???
And in argument, some fuckhead will tell me – why don’t you do something then?? Go join the Army. I’ll say this – Firstly, I’m doing what I want to do, and then, I do what is expected of me – I pay my taxes, I stop at the red light (before the zebra crossing), I don’t bribe. I expect or rather DEMAND, that the government I have elected do its job. And more than that, I expect the fellow Indians to do their duty. Don’t be a filthy hypocrite bunch, yelling abuses at the traffic cop while your million rupee vehicle mows down people on the road. Change. Change yourself.
We have reached here without any planning. This country is an accident. The causalities have been low, but they are increasing. We are growing, but that’s inflation. The cities have no roads, but the fucking builders are producing bastard malls by raping the earth. Where are the roads? The road that was 10m wide 10 years back is still 10m wide – the traffic- that’s 10 folds…and now there is a five story mall by the roadside, right in the middle of a residential neighborhood. Which country worth its soil has this??
The list is endless – millions without sanitation, electricity, EDUCATION! I sound like an everyday chest beater who cries his country’s follies and then snuggles up in his warm bed and blanket at night, forgetting everything. But lately, it’s been tough having a sound sleep. It’s a point blanc life we live these days. It better get settled down and WE need to ensure it does so.
Change is very important. Even a promise of it made someone the President and an election campaign probably the most successful in that country’s history. Well, I don’t see an Obama in India’s future. What we do have is us – a billion Obamas. We are everywhere. We are the ones who run the civil services, the hospitals, the courts, the schools, the farms, the buses - everywhere, everything. We need to change. No other way will do.
Whoever tells you that India is ‘shinning’, that it’ll be a superpower by 2030 or whatever year is a fucking liar.
How can it be a superpower? On what basis? The bloody GDP and FDI? I don’t care about them, no sir! Give me a good road to walk on and some public transportation first. Fuck the Indian cricket. I don’t care if we loose every single match henceforth or Sachin gets out on 99 till he retires, I simply don’t give a fuck! Those are the least important things in our country’s context.
We need real growth. We need mobilization of funds and people, of minds and acts, to put the people first. The one billion people are expecting some basics in their lives from the government. And those expectations have been there for ages now. Don’t sell us the story of a shinning India for there exists none. The multi-millions of poor have always been in the rear view, much closer than they appear. But we have been ignoring all of them…I say we since it is not some alien superpower or our very ‘friendly’ neighbors that have caused the exploitation of our masses. It’s been us all along the way. We have shunted our own growth. We, who don’t pay taxes, we who break the signal everyday, we who bribe as per our convenience and then close our eyes and shout in protest, we who realize only after a dozen and more cops die from the 7.62 mm Kalashnikov bullets that ‘OH! They did not have good enough bullet proof vests’. You fucking morons, it took you a bunch of brave hearts cops’ death to realize that???
And in argument, some fuckhead will tell me – why don’t you do something then?? Go join the Army. I’ll say this – Firstly, I’m doing what I want to do, and then, I do what is expected of me – I pay my taxes, I stop at the red light (before the zebra crossing), I don’t bribe. I expect or rather DEMAND, that the government I have elected do its job. And more than that, I expect the fellow Indians to do their duty. Don’t be a filthy hypocrite bunch, yelling abuses at the traffic cop while your million rupee vehicle mows down people on the road. Change. Change yourself.
We have reached here without any planning. This country is an accident. The causalities have been low, but they are increasing. We are growing, but that’s inflation. The cities have no roads, but the fucking builders are producing bastard malls by raping the earth. Where are the roads? The road that was 10m wide 10 years back is still 10m wide – the traffic- that’s 10 folds…and now there is a five story mall by the roadside, right in the middle of a residential neighborhood. Which country worth its soil has this??
The list is endless – millions without sanitation, electricity, EDUCATION! I sound like an everyday chest beater who cries his country’s follies and then snuggles up in his warm bed and blanket at night, forgetting everything. But lately, it’s been tough having a sound sleep. It’s a point blanc life we live these days. It better get settled down and WE need to ensure it does so.
Change is very important. Even a promise of it made someone the President and an election campaign probably the most successful in that country’s history. Well, I don’t see an Obama in India’s future. What we do have is us – a billion Obamas. We are everywhere. We are the ones who run the civil services, the hospitals, the courts, the schools, the farms, the buses - everywhere, everything. We need to change. No other way will do.
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